she kept yelling 'call me bella'
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
