Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I just forgot I was standing up.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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