that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
