Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Buhtt sex?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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