How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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