she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
