Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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