in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
