Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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