8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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