i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
A bitchslap is in order.
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