He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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