Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
