I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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