It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize