I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
