The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
