Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
two words: eviction party
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Everclear isn't food dammit
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
