Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
His nipple licking is glorious
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