I wish I could punch you in the face.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize