3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
you inspire me to be a worse person
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Randomize
