I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
