i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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