Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
