I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
