this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
