Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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