She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
