Heybabeimwearingurpanties
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
