I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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