school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
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