Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
