brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize
