they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
