I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
