If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize