Sry I called you an 8
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
