Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
