Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
