Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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