Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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