your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
