why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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