Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
