we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
