I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
