did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
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