This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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