And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
you would pick up someone in the library
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
