Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
