i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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