...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
