hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Randomize
